The thing about the beginning is, that it's also always the end. That end came for me today after several years working for American Express. As I was walking out I couldn't help but feel like I was going through a "It's not you, it's me" kind of break up. I know I chose it, but that doesn't mean it wasn't hard for me to say goodbye (or well actually just sneak out without saying goodbye because that would have pushed me over they edge). It's funny how I've looked forward to this day for as long as I've known it was coming, but I was never really prepared for how I would feel about it once it came. I was good at my job, it came so naturally to me that it wasn't hard, it wasn't even like work really, so in a way it seems like a lost opportunity. But, if you don't push yourself you loose interest. We have to stretch ourselves and take on new challenges in order to grow. That challenge for me is going to be staying at home with my kids. I know, calling it a "challenge" seems like quite a stretch, but for me it is. It is completely unknown territory for me and in some ways has been fodder for jokes of mine for years. So my challenge will be making sure that I don't fall into any of the cliches that I've always associated with being a S.A.H.M. and do the very best job I can of teaching my children values that are important to me and spending as much "quality time" with them as I can. The possibilites are vast and I intend to capitalize on this time that I am so blessed to have.
Anyway, tomorrow I'll post something funny to balance all this emotional hudu out.